this is my new favorite twitter account
I’m gonna scream
Fox News is so incredily diverse. Look at all the color: eggshell, mayo, flour, starch, bleach, cauliflower
These are all so beautiful and functional.
ah yes, i see the bedroom fandom is growing.
I screamed at the first one
i just made this video
It gets funnier every time I watch it.
I don’t understand it but I like it
nervous to talk to a girl? here are some good conversation topics to break the ice:
-the second law of thermodynamics
My roommate bought a pack of 24 rolls of toilet paper yesterday, in addition to the half dozen we already had, and stored all of them in the bathroom. And just let me tell you, there’s something incredibly calming and reassuring about looking next to you while you’re on the toilet and seeing 30 rolls of toilet paper sitting there. You get a feeling like, no matter how bad shit gets in there, you’re always going to make it out okay in the end.
BITCH I WILL FUCKING CUT YOU
YOU’VE ANGERED THE WRONG FANDOM
You’re going down punk, just you FUCKNG WAIT!! You will learn that this fandom is far worse than you will ever want to know. We may seem soft and shy, but we’re just being NICE! We can be cold, cruel, mean, and make you suffer and wish you had never said what you said. We can send you into the farthest most empty reaches of the galaxy, summon demons to our disposal to make you suffer, and make you feel the feelings that we experience, and don’t fucking think for a single goddamn second that’s easy! The amount of emotions that would boil inside of you would literally kill you. So keep your motherfucking distance and we won’t hurt you, so stay the hell back, asshole. If you so much as insult us one more time, we will bring firey hell upon you and bitch slap you into oblivion. Your move, dildo.
We know how to kill a human and hide the evidence. Your body will never be found, and that is a promise.
The blackest bird there ever was. It’s black on the outside from head to toe, and black on the inside with its meat and organs.
It’s called the Ayam Cemani from Indonesia, and they’re $2,500 a pop. Their bones are black, too. The only part of them that’s not black is their blood
I hate it when you really need to talk to a friend about something important because you feel like your world is crashing down on you but they act like you don’t exist until their problems occur.
the baby boomer culture: how an entire generation literally will not shut up about young people doing things they enjoy
The Divorce Culture: how an entire generation couldn’t keep it together, and forgot how to not project their insecurities onto children.
why is being alive so expensive
You spelled “suck” wrong.
i literally can’t even tell what you’re trying to say
- why is being alive so suck
- why is being alive suck
- why is suck
- suck is being alive so expensive
- why suck so expensive
what the hell is going on
imagine how is touch the suck
imagine how is suck the sky